Congratulations!

You made it through 101 Lines and When to Use Them. Thank you for reading along, and for all of the hard work you’ve put in along the way. Before we wrap up, here are a few valuable tools to get the most out of this book.

1.    Bring the patience. When you start using new tools it can feel very exciting and new, but the big results come with time. None of these strategies alone are enough to overhaul your business. Every one of these tips takes time to get right, and your abilities will grow the more you practice and put in effort. Don’t get discouraged if it doesn’t all click right away! Just keep growing and creating solutions that work for you.

2.    More Problems are Good Problems. As long as they’re not the same problems you had before. When you try new things, you’re going to face new issues. Getting more invested in your work and your at-work actions can bring some frustration along the way—because you’re now comparing yourself to where you want to be. Remember to appreciate your progress, and to keep your goals related to your purpose. 

3.    A note on foulweather friends.  If you start really putting into action new information and practices, you may see some changes in your friend group. Some people that used to hang around you all the time may have less and less in common with you as you evolve and grow. Others that used to support you may give you insincere compliments, or worse—come up with reasons they don’t want to be around you—because they’re not interested in seeing you win. It would go against their own destructive self-beliefs. 

Try not to take it personally. Their responses are not about you. If you’re working hard on yourself and your business, learn to tune it out. Only you know what’s important to you and your future, and if someone in your life isn’t supporting your growth- you know that’s about them and their own lack of progress. This also doesn’t mean you have to bully them or coax them into growing with you.

 Everyone is living on their own timeline. Some of those people may come back to your life as they start making progress, others may be miles ahead of your in meeting their goals, and some may never catch up and will never want to. Learn to live and let live, but don’t get caught up on their expectations or goals. And make room for all the amazing new people that will come your way as you take yourself to higher levels!

4.    Practice, practice, practice. We’ve touched on this concept quite a bit, but it’s very helpful to throw in a reminder at the end as well. This book is NOT a complete sales training program- no single book, program, or course is. It was written from one perspective, with one guiding theme, and for one section of the industry. To grow beyond what’s in this book, please continue your training wherever you go. No matter what industry, business, or project is next in your life, the ability to connect with, negotiate with, and ultimately persuade others can help you massively in accomplishing your goals. Don’t stop practicing, and don’t limit yourself to what anyone else is doing. Your best asset, inside and outside of the club, will always be you.

5.    Compassion comes first. Your only competition is you.  And after getting through a book like this, you may be competing pretty hard. But after the work is done, you are still going to be there- so make sure that for all the hard work, you give yourself great rewards and valuable alone-time outside of the club.  There are going to be sales you absolutely mess up.  There will be difficult customers, tough nights, insecurity, fear, and discomfort. All of those don’t go away when you try to get better- and they may even affect you more at first as you push yourself to improve. Remember to be kind to the only person you have to share every moment on this earth with. Don’t punish yourself if you miss a target, or if a sale slips through your hands, or if you need more days off than you wanted. That’s part of the process.

6.    Progress, not perfection. On the same note, remember you’re only human.  Keeping a strong pace, working lots of shifts in a row, or closing a ton of deals can feel great. But if you hit a wall or burnout, you don’t have to prove anything to anyone. Your progress doesn’t have to look like anyone else’s, and you don’t need to make thousands of dollars every night to get a ton out of this industry. Don’t stop yourself from appreciating your blessings because someone else is getting theirs. This is your story. 

7.    What Do You Do Outside of Here? It’s obnoxious when customers ask, but you need to be asking yourself this question often. This industry (like any other) has a shelf life. And unlike many industries, ours has gatekeepers. While you are still enjoying your prime as an entertainer, focus in on what you’re trying to get out of this. Having bigger goals than a shift or a bank account balance can give you the fuel you need through difficult times- and ground your wins and losses into a much healthier overall perspective.

8.    Enjoy your life. Seriously. It can be easy to get caught up with work, especially when it’s going well. But there is a life outside of the building, and lots of beautiful things to see, do, and feel.   These are some of the best years of your life. Save, invest, work hard, and stay booked and busy- just don’t lose sight of the big picture. This industry can give you so many amazing experiences and opportunities, but only when you seek them out. Travel, make new friends, learn new things, and bring all that amazing energy back to the club with you.

9.    Find bigger stages. It gets so much bigger than the club. Learning how to sell, how to manage your income, how to change your mindset- these skills can take you a lot farther than the strip club.  You can bring those same skills into your investment portfolio, your new business, and your education. Your growth doesn’t have to stop—inside or outside of the club. Make a practice of challenging yourself, trying things that scare you a little, and taking your goals seriously.  

10. Wherever you go, there you are. We spoke about attitude inside the club a lot here, but I want to acknowledge the person who started this book thinking:

“This doesn’t apply to me or my club.”

“This b*tch doesn’t understand my life.”

“Easy for her to say. That’s not how it works for everyone else.”

These phrases are extremely familiar to me. For decades that was my attitude. Inside and outside of the club, I walked around convinced that no one could understand my trial and tribulations- and that there was no point in trying out the advice or information others gave me- because they just couldn’t get where I was coming from. I held these beliefs with me before the club, and walked into this space defensive, angry, bitter, and very sad. 

It took a long time to break down the toxic beliefs that I carried around.  And as I became less angry, less bitter, and less fearful, I was able to appreciate and take in more and more of what others said.  Not every conversation ended in a fight, or in a disappointment. Not every lesson felt like a sham or a dead end. A lot of those limiting beliefs were in me, and letting them go gave me my life back. But that took a lot of time and a lot of work, and didn’t all happen in one go.

It’s the reason behind writing a book like this- to share just how much potential and beauty I’ve found because of this industry, and the many lessons that others have taken the time to teach me. Without this industry, and the people in it, my life would look very different. If you’re struggling, frustrated, or afraid, remember that there is a whole lot of light at the end of the tunnel.  

There are opportunities in our industry for so many of us that may never show up in our lives again. There are chances to change ourselves, change the world around us, and build legacies that will outlive us. And for anyone who has been questioned about joining the industry, about their work ethic, or about their belief in themselves, I want to leave you with this:  

You are not a failure because you are in this industry.

You have not lost your way because you are in this industry.

You do not have a bad future ahead of you because you are in this industry.

And more than that,

                       You can build the life you want to live through this industry.

You can become the person you want to be through this industry.

And you can bring others up through this industry along the way.

           This is your story. 

Only you get to write it.

Write it well.

Wishing you all the happiness, health, growth, and peace you deserve.

Love,

Carmen